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Today you are taking your �pariksha� (test);
however, a spiritual path has three important
components: Pariksha (tests), Samiksha
(introspection) and Pratiksha (waiting).
The true
Pariksha is not simply passing a test given by someone else.
The true pariksha is when you start taking your own test.
The true pariksha is when you start taking your own photo
with the camera of your own heart. The true pariksha is when
you start checking yourself all the time � checking your
volume, checking your actions, checking your thoughts,
checking your eyes and your ears. We must not simply rely
on others to take our test in life. Sometimes we can fool
others, but we can never fool God and we can never fool our
Guru. So, the true pariksha is when you start watching
yourself, knowing that God and Guru are always watching you.
There is
a beautiful story of a Guru who, nearing the end of his
inhabitance in this Earthly body, called his three closest
disciples together and said, �I�m giving you a test. To
each of you I will give an apple. You must go from here, eat
the apple without being seen by anyone and then return as
quickly as possible. He who returns first will be my
successor. But, be sure that no one can see you.�
The 3
disciples were each given their apple and went off in 3
separate directions. After a few hours the first disciple
returned, �Guruji,� he exclaimed. �I went to the top of the
highest mountain and there I ate my apple. Even the birds
could not fly as high as this mountain; therefore there was
nobody who could watch me.� The Guru nodded in silence.
In the
evening the second disciple returned, breathless. �Guruji,
Guruji, went into the deepest, darkest cave in the
mountainside. There I
crawled into the darkness and ate my apple, unseen by any
being.� The Guru nodded but said nothing.
The
night passed as did the following day, but still the third
disciple did not return. Finally, on the afternoon of the
fourth day, the disciple returned slowly with his head down.
�I have failed you, my master,� he said. �I climbed
mountains, I swam in the rivers, I crawled into the trunks
of trees and into deep pits in the ground. But, everywhere I
went God�s eyes were watching me. There was nowhere I could
escape His gaze.� The Master said, �You, my child, are the
one who shall be my successor, for you are the only one who
understands the true nature of God and His omniscience.�
When we
realize that God is always watching us, then we will never
go astray. That is true pariksha.
The
second aspect is Samiksha � introspection. We must
constantly analyze and re-analyze ourselves. We must never
become complacent. At the end of the day, a good businessman
always checks his balance sheet: how much has he made, how
much has he spent? Similarly, a good teacher reviews her
students� test scores: how many passed, how many failed?
By
looking at their successes and failures, they assess how
well they are doing. Are the businessman�s profits greater
than his losses? Are most of the teacher�s students passing
the exams?
In the
same way, each night, we must examine the balance sheet of
our day: what were our successes, what were our failures.
And for all the successes, all our �plus-points� we must
give credit to God. For, we have truly done nothing
but let Him work through us. All credit goes to Him.
He is the one who saves us, who maintains our dignity and
our success. It is only by His grace that our eyes can see
the work in front of us, that our hands can perform the
necessary tasks, that our brains can understand
instructions, that our mouths can speak. So, we must never
become arrogant; we must never think that it is �we� who
have accomplished something. It is only His grace working
through us.
Our
failures, we must also give to him. The fault is ours,
definitely. Yet, He is so forgiving and so
compassionate that He insists we turn these over to Him as
well. We must say, �God, please take these minus points.
You know that I am weak, you know that I am nothing.
Please make me stronger tomorrow.� In this way,
each night we check our balance sheet, and we pray to God to
help us have fewer minus points, to make us stronger, to
make us better hands doing his work, to give us more faith,
more devotion.
A
true spiritual seeker always introspects frequently and
always strives to be better the next day.
Last is
pratiksha � waiting. One must always wait. We must do our
sadhana, perform our duties and then wait for the grace of
God to shine upon us. Sometimes I hear people say �But when
will He bless me with a vision of Him?� or �I have been
doing sadhana for so long and still my mind is restless.�
There is no set rule to how quickly one attains the state of
spiritual bliss. This all God�s plan. Patience, patience and
patience � we must cultivate this in our sadhana. However,
one thing is certain: His grace WILL come. His grace and
blessings WILL be bestowed upon those who dedicate their
lives to Him. This is definite. Only the time and the way
are in His hands. So, we must just keep doing our sadhana,
keep surrendering our lives to Him, stay humble and pure and
we must have faith that in the right time the shower of
grace will fall upon us.
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